FullMetal Deck
by Angel Weasel-Woman
Summary: A strange young woman shows up for Battle City with a unique deck of cards in her possession. 'What kind of card is an Edward Elric? '


Jounouchi groaned as he stared out the window, the Mythology teacher droning on in the background. It was such a beautiful day out and he was stuck inside some stuffy school learning about some fictitious country and its strange customs.

'Equivalent Exchange? Who cares about some stupid rules, this isn't chem.!'

He threw his arms back and yawned loudly, making the teacher glare at him.

"Jounouchi-san. Maybe you would like to explain to the class the properties of the Philosopher's Stone?"

"Uhh…"

Ding Ding Ding

Jounouchi leapt to his feet, gathered up his pack and was halfway out the door before the bell stopped ringing. "See you tomorrow, teach!"

He laughed as he ducked past the people piling out into the hallway from their final classes, fighting his way to the front steps to wait for Yuugi. It was too bad that the small boy's class was on the opposite end of the school from Jounouchi's; it always took him so long to get there…

A heavy arm suddenly fell over his shoulders and Jounouchi grunted, glaring at Honda's grinning face out of the corner of his eye.

"What's up, Jou?" Honda asked, ignoring the look as the blonde shrugged his arm off.

"Waiting for Yuugi. You think he stayed back to get some help on his homework or something?"

"Who knows. Maybe the crowd just carried him off 'cause he's so short," Honda laughed. Jou smirked and leaned up against the side of the school, watching as the crowd of students thinned as they walked off. Anzu stopped by momentarily, initiating small talk and in general wasting time before she had to be home.

It was as she was talking about that morning's lesson she'd had in myth (Jounouchi hoped he hadn't managed to piss off the teacher too bad last period. At least he wasn't being chased down again like last week…), when Honda suddenly blinked and asked, "Who's that?"

Anzu fumed for a moment, having been caught in the middle of her word, but she looked in the direction indicated and paused. Standing there near the school gates was a young woman, possibly the same age as they themselves. Auburn hair was pulled back in a low ponytail that reached just past her shoulders, and a cream-colored ribbon trailed down to her hips. A bulky eye patch covered one eye, leaving the other to flick over the grounds. She wore a red trench coat over a black shirt over fishnet that connected to a collar, an indefinable pendant hanging from it and resting against the base of her throat. A long denim skirt draped off her hips, reaching past her feet to drag on the ground, and she absently ran her hands over the fabric, smoothing it out and revealing white gloves that vanished into red sleeves.

"Is she a new student?" Jounouchi asked, eyeing her lost look.

"How does she walk in that thing?" Anzu mumbled, eyes focused on the dirt and dust accumulating on the hem of the girl's skirt.

"Is there some sort of convention on the stairs that I was unaware of, or do you just have nothing to do?" a cold voice asked from behind the trio.

"Kaiba…" Jounouchi growled.

The teen smirked and was about to open his mouth to say something, when a soft, female voice called tentatively, "Kaiba?"

Kaiba looked to the young girl who was grinning at him, twitched, and then turned to walk back into the school. The trio turned to look at the girl who was pointing where Kaiba had been and gaping, a look of amusement fighting with anger in her eye. She flailed at the door and put her hands on her hips with a sigh.

"What a jerk. You'd think he'd be happier to see me after all this time." She smiled at the confused students and happily bounced up the stairs to follow Kaiba, hiking up her skirt just enough to not trip over it. A moment later, Yuugi walked out, looking very confused.

"Did I just see Kaiba running from a girl with an eye patch screaming, 'Get away from me, you crazy bitch'?"

"… Your guess is as good as ours, buddy," Jounouchi mumbled as they began to walk away, thoroughly confused and scarred from the encounter.

* * *

_Please… Anyone… Anything…_

_I beg of you! Save them! _

* * *

"So you finally show up again… You track me down to me school… You beat mewith my own briefcase… And now you're taking a _nap_ in my _car_? What is wrong with you, Angel!" 

The young woman groaned and sat up, rubbing her eyes sleepily. "You talk too loud, Seto-chan…" She yelped as she was suddenly smacked in the side of the head with a briefcase.

"I don't recall ever giving you permission to call me by my first name, and definitely not 'chan'. ("Pissy," Angel mumbled, dodging another flying briefcase.) What are you even doing here? I thought you were gone for good."

"Unfortunately I'm not that easy to get rid of…" She blinked. "Wait. How long was I gone?"

"Five relaxing weeks."

"Five weeks!" She attempted to leap out of her seat, only to smack her head into he top of the limo and fall back into her seat. "I was in that damned country for almost two and a half years!" She flailed irritably, "accidentally" kicking Kaiba's shins.

"Funny," Kaiba grunted, not wanting to give Angel the satisfaction of knowing that his leg was now throbbing. "Last time Mokuba went through the wardrobe, he was gone for almost fifteen years in as many days."

Angel glared. "Mokuba also went to the place with that goat-bastard that _still_ has my socks…"

Kaiba smirked. "So then where did you end up?"

Angel pouted and shifted so that her left hand covered her right. "I was in… a place where war ravished the whole continent… My friends came so close to dieing so many times… And I–"

"You what?" Kaiba asked, an eye brow rising.

"Shut-up!" She clutched at her skirt. "You wouldn't care, you self-absorbed asshole!"

"And why are you wearing a skirt? You never wore one before you went through the wardrobe." He reached out to grab the denim fabric covering her legs.

He wasn't even within half a foot oh her outfit when sharp steel was pressed to his throat, warmed by Angel's palm from where the throwing knife had been hidden. Her usual devil-may-care look was replace by a hard glare she had probably stolen from Kaiba himself

"You stay the hell away from my legs, pervert. If I ever catch you peeping on me, I swear I will not hesitate to gouge your eyes out."

Kaiba ignored the death pressing against his neck, and instead narrowed his eyes. "And just where do you think you'll be staying that will allow me to… _peep_ on you?"

"Where I was before I got lost, of course," Angel replied flippantly, replacing her throwing knife back into her glove. "In that really cool room on the third story of your house with all the dragons in it."

Kaiba's eye twitched. "You mean _my_ room?"

Angel smirked and reached up to tie the ribbon on her hair into a bow as the limo began to roll to a stop in front of the Kaiba Mansion. "Yeah that one. It was really funny locking you outof your own room. Does it still have that kick ass wooden dragon statue who's foot I broke off sitting in the corner?"

"You broke it!"

"Apparently that's a yes."

Kaiba leapt at her. "That cost five thousand dollars, bitch!"

Angel ducked and bolted out the door, tumbling on the ground and scrambling for her life as Kaiba himself lunged after her, determined to strangle her until she stopped twitching. She laughed and ran up to the front door, stumbling over her skirt a time or two before hiking it up enough so as for it to not be in her way. She slammed into the door, knocking frantically on it.

Kaiba was almost there when Mokuba answered the door, causing Angel to stumble into the main hall, shouting, "I call the dragon room!"

Mokuba blinked as Kaiba growled before straightening his uniform. He watched his big brother as he calmly walked into the house and contemplated the best way to drag Angel from _his_ room and out into the hallway when she was asleep. Finally, the child sighed and closed the door. He thought that wardrobe had eaten Angel.

So much for wistful thinking…

* * *

Angel doesn't own YuGiOh, Fullmetal Alchemist, Chronicles of Narnia, Family Guy or anything else she forgot to mention aside from Angel herself. 


End file.
